sometimes, it's funny how a song can actually change a person's life.
that doesn't happen so often. but usually, songs are pretty useful in conveying messages and reminders to that puny brain of ours when we're lost. i guess this is especially so for people like me who's always having my two precious earphones stuck in my ears and my beloved ipod in my pocket.
"won't look back, when i say goodbye. i'm gonna leave this hole behind me, gonna take what's mine tonight. 'cos every wasted day, becomes a wasted chance. you're gonna wake up feeling sorry, 'cos life won't wait"
"i guess it's up to you"
ok songs aside. went for physio session this week (finally!) for my back, and there will be more sessions to go to ensure my back fully recovers. good la, got more excuses to get off pass (HA!). anw, on my way back to camp from SGH, i happen to witness a no-hit-and-run-and-come-back accident just outside my camp.
it went like this: the car was turning from my camp's car park onto the main road but the (lady) driver failed to spot an oncoming motorbike and cause the motorbike to swerve to one side to avoid the car. the bike, together with the 2 guys riding it ended up skidding for a good 40m on the wet road. the lady began to panic and drove off, leaving the 2 guys swearing and cursing at her. one guy only suffered some scratches while the other had 2 deep cuts on his left foot. so i ended up running to the guard house to borrow first-aid kid to help attend to them.
it was only then then i realised i should have paid more attention to the (lousy and boring) lectures given by the medics a few months back cos i was like ransacking through the first aid kid for a while not knowing what to do. in the end, all i did was to wipe the blood off, wrapped his wounds tight with some first aid dressing and waited with him for the ambulance to arrive. in the meantime, the lady driver drove back (yea that's why i called it a no-hit-and-run-and-come-back accident) and started apologising to the 2 guys. the pool of blood + the 2 guys blaming her for driving away started to make her cry (at that moment i was like "what the hell... this is so drama man...")
as i was pondering over if i should console her somehow, this guy wearing NDU shirt came towards us and to my disappointment, he wasn't the medic (LOL) but the lady's BF. the ambulance came a while later before i finally took my leave and reached my camp late (xD)
that incident somehow made me want to get posted to medic course to learn something useful, but i guess that isn't possible anymore with my pes status now being downgraded to C2L2 for 6 months, along with the longest list of excuses i've had so far:
1)excuse diving for 6 months 2)excuse heavy load for 6 months 3)excuse standing broad jump for 6 months 4)excuse shuttle run for 6 months 5)excuse running, marching, jumping for 6 months
point 1 is redundant since i'm no longer a diver, and point 3 and 4 is the same as point 5 so i'm assuming sembawang medical centre has a lot of ink in it's printer. but anyway i'm probably gonna ignore some of them because i know there's no way i can sit there and do nothing for 6 months.
1)excuse diving, i still can swim and snorkel 2)'heavy' is subjective 3,4,5) cannot run, can jog. cannot march, good. cannot jump, ehhh ya better not jump too much 6)never say cannot play tennis
aaron | 5:15 PM
Sunday, July 20, 2008
i totally agree with yi sheng (my army friend who ooc just like me due to injuries) when he was complaining about how he felt like s*** watching our fellow batch boys going through hell, and yet all we can do is to sit at the sidelines and watch them as the pain on their faces ache our hearts.
"it's like being the star player of the team, and yet the coach refuses to let you play and end up causing the team to lose. that's the kind of feeling"
the thought that we should have been there with them kept crossing our minds, but yet at the same time we clearly know that we should be where we are now. it's difficult to convince yourself sometimes.
though we're no longer together as a batch, the past few months have really been somewhat fulfilling for me. i've gained a bunch of new friends whom i can trust and work together with, that's all that mattered. and it's really nice to see the few of us trying to help them throughout hellweek. small actions like secretly giving them sweets to keep them awake talks alot about how we're still a part of them, not apart.
as for me, getting ooc-ed seem to be a hard fall. but this is no time to be stopping. even though it seems as if i can stay down and waste my life away for a while, i'd rather get up and start thinking of what i want to do with the time i have.
but before that there's something for me to look forward to of course.
block leave (yes i haven't had mine yet) and i'll be going to hokkaido then! HAHA!
aaron | 5:45 PM
Saturday, July 12, 2008
even with tired, fragile wings, i will continue running, in search of a dream
as long as we can swim freely in our dreams, we don't need that sky anymore
indulging myself in jrock to forget.
aaron | 2:38 PM
Friday, July 11, 2008
it all fell upon me when the MO stamped his name and signed on my FFI report. though i had kinda expected that to happen, and no matter how much i try to tell myself it's for my own good, i could still feel my heart sinking, deeper and deeper into the abyss. it was heavy.
and when i stepped into the auditorium, everyone was there, laughing around, joking around, playing a fool like always. i sat at the back, quietly, and there was only one thing going through my mind. i'm not going to be part of them anymore. i was on the verge of breaking down.
then staff koh stepped in, read my FFI report and without hesitation, ordered me to pack my belongings. as i walked down the steps towards to door, a few of them whispered, in a shaky tone: "bye aaron". i didn't know how to face them, so i just quietly open the door and went out.
as i dragged my belongings away from block 29A, i tried to convince myself that even i had chosen this path, i would still be able to do something meaningful, at least. but when the head clerk briefed us on our duties and what we'll most likely be doing in the future, i felt like stabbing myself.
我还不想认命
but whatever it is, it's a decision i've made and i shall not regret it.
damn
aaron | 7:20 PM
Sunday, July 6, 2008
it's another king of grass vs. king of clay finals at wimbledon. oh well, they're just too good i guess. whatever happened to djokovic... i was hoping he would cause an upset... but nonetheless, i'm more hoping that nadal will be the one to cause the upset.
ok so i'm about to book in yet again. this week will be the last week for the physical condition phase (finally!). not that it has been taxing on me though, because i've sat out for 2 (out of 6) weeks due to a back strain (which, i hope is just a strain). but still, i'll be hoping for it to be over so that diving can start soon (and i'll have to start mugging again, yay), and i can finally keep my hair (!!). now as we enter the final week, the gates of hell is just staring right at our face.
yes, it's the final week before hellweek
last week had a day of 'orientation' at hell. it was already a killer. really, hellweek is something none of you can imagine. the instructor told us at the end of hellweek (that is, if i can make it to the end), even the toughest guy will cry for sure. even those who don't will still cry when he see the people around him crying. haha, wonder how will i be like.
oh man, my mind's totatlly preoccupied by the thoughts of hellweek right now. argh.
anyone running the nike+ human race? i don't know why but somehow it seems many people around me are taking part, so i should too i guess, even though it means booking in right after the run.
1 week to Hellweek 15 weeks to end of CDC 18 months to ORD
aaron | 4:59 PM
Friday, July 4, 2008
survived hellday.
now, multiply that by five.
i seriously cannot picture how i'll look like and feel like on day 5. seriously.
aaron | 7:35 PM
Aaron
210389.
qifa pri
river valley high
national junior college
hq rsn
nus??